HILTS: Long distance relationships… Are they truly realistic?

Kaderra Hilts is a senior mass communication major from Arlington, Texas.   

A round of applause for those who have figured out long distance relationships because it is not an easy task. 

Long distance relationships have a lot of  factors to them such as the distance, the means of communicating, and how often you and your partner can see each other in person. This type of relationship, like all relationships, requires a lot of trust and disciple.

Many college students have had these types of relationships before. They had a high school sweetheart that they left back at home or does not attend the same college. College is probably the worst time to test out a long distance relationship. 

When you go to college you’re put into an environment with different types of people and experiences. You or your partner may feel restricted because the relationship may interfere with enjoying your college experience to the fullest extent. 

It doesn’t necessarily mean they want to be with someone else. There are many activities that may not be appropriate to do while in a relationship but they could also want to try someone else.

I’ve always wanted to stay away from situations like this because it seems like most of the relationship is spent missing your partner and wishing they were with you. You don’t get to feel their touch or fully enjoy their presence. 

Smart-phones have made it easier to feel as if you are in the same room with someone miles away, however they can’t make up for everything. 

A successful long distance relationship requires a lot of work. You need to make time for each other, trust each other 110%, and communicate as openly and often as possible. It also takes a large amount of maturity that I don’t believe I have at this moment. 

You have to be understanding when your partner wants to go out and have fun and you can’t talk to them. You have to make an effort to not neglect communicating with your partner just because they are not in your everyday life. You also have to trust them to be loyal to you. If there is even a little bit of doubt the entire relationship can fall apart.

Long distance relationships can also create a feeling of inadequacy that can turn into possessiveness, jealousy, clinginess, or just the inability to see that you are pushing your partner away. 

You have to work through your arguments and disagreement because your communication is voluntary. Depending on the distance, “popping up” is not an option. 

I won’t say that I don’t believe in long distance relationships. I think they are wonderful if both partners decide to make an active effort to stay in a relationship. I could only do this with someone that I felt like I would marry in the future.