Burley: Effects of an unhealthy relationship on a person

Joshua Burley is a senior mass communication major from Corinth, Tx.

What is considered to be an unhealthy and toxic relationship? Sometimes we never take the chance to step back and observe people’s personalities, where they come from, their upbringing, as well as their treatment toward the other person within a relationship. 

Sometimes, we know exactly what we are getting into, but hope for the best within a situation. A lot of students do not  take the time to step back and actually see whether or not they are in a toxic relationship.

 Mahatma Gandhi once said, “Spiritual relationships are far more precious than physical. Physical relationship divorced from spirituality is a body without a soul.”  

What I personally take from Gandhi is that whenever you are finding your significant other, there is usually a soul bound connection between you and another person. When people get into relationships on a college campus anywhere, most of the time it is about the physical. 

Most of them actually want a true, genuine relationship. Most of the time it is about fulfilling the desires of the flesh; however, there are a few students who actually do care about finding somebody from a spiritually based perspective. 

I remember back  in my sophomore year in my general psychology class, where we were discussing who is usually at fault in a relationship. Was it the guy’s fault or the girl’s fault? 

So after listening to what appeared to be the battle of the sexes, I finally got up in the class and said, “If there is a focus or a purpose within a relationship, then the two parties should not have ever been together in the first place.” 

The Bible even says in the book of Song of Solomon 8:4: “To not to awaken love until the time is right.” This is one of the biggest problems that we are facing when it comes to finding somebody. We are impatient. 

Some of us do not know that we are just not ready to be in a relationship because some of us are still trying to find who we are in this life. Some of us are only looking for somebody to fulfill the desires of the flesh.

There is no trying to find somebody to spend the rest of your life with on a college campus.  It is just an in and out thing, which leads us to skating on thin ice with that man or woman who never had a care in the world for you. 

Some of us know people who are stuck in a toxic relationship right now. Some know that they need to leave, but refuse to. Why? Because sometimes when you bond with a person sexually, it is challenging to let go of the other person.  Some of us have the willpower to leave while others are not strong enough to let go.  

While we cannot help those who are stuck in toxic relationships, we can always try. 

In theatre, they say that the world is a stage: not only does this mean that everyone is a character, but it also means that not everyone is who they claim to be. We have to watch people from a distance because who they are when they are trying to get into contact with you, are not the same people when they are with their friends.