Expect little, believe little, get little, your choice

“People will be rewarded for what they say; they will be rewarded by how they speak. What you say can mean life or death. Those who speak with care will be rewarded.” Proberbs 18:20-21 NIV

I have a testimony that needs to be told and I can’t bear to keep it to myself any longer; so here it goes.

On August 11th I received a call from my family physician stating, “Ms. Minor, I have something to tell you.” By the tone of her voice I knew it had to be something serious.

She proceeded to tell me that she looked over my blood work up that was collected the day I went in to have my physical exam for the year and found that I had tested positive for a rare blood disease, which in time could evolve into cancer and maybe be the cause of my demise.

She told me that I needed to see a specialist to continue with the rest of my blood work-up and to set up a treatment schedule. After hanging up the phone with her I was mortified! Being a nursing student, I quickly read through all of my nursing books to see if what the doctor was telling me was true, but most of all, I wanted to see how long I had left to live. I even found myself searching the internet for information, e-mailing doctors, calling hospitals and clinics trying to rid myself of what was really happening. All the while I was actually making my situation worse than it was.

Every word that I read literally tore me apart. Almost every sign and symptom that the books stated, I experienced it. I stopped eating, sleeping, I couldn’t function correctly at work; I stopped hanging out with my friends and answering my phone. I even began to prepare for my funeral.

Day in and day out all that went through my mind was failure and death. The devil was on his job. Every time I got in my car to go somewhere I would either pass up a funeral home, a funeral precession, a hearse or a cemetery. I would tell myself, “that’s going to be you in a few months.”

One night while on break at work, I was lead to call my cousin who is with her one- year -old daughter at St. Judes in Tennessee. While speaking with her about the progression of her daughter, despite what she is going through she began to minister to me. She said she didn’t know why she was telling me the things she was saying but she felt that I needed to hear them.

The two things that she told me that really weighed heavy on my heart was the scripture quoted at the beginning of this column and Numbers 14:28, “So tell them, this is what the Lord says. I heard what you said, and as surely as I live, I will do those very things to you.”

Ever since that night I made it my business to no longer allow Satan to consume and control me as he was, no matter what it took. When I decided to change my thought process and begin to allow God to use me, God allowed me to think about how He delivered my nephew from liver cancer in 2000, how He delivered my dad from a cranial aneurysm in 1997, and my cousin’s daughter mentioned earlier from cancer of the eyes this year. She was born blind but now she can see better than you and me.

I knew that if God did it for them, He can and will deliver me. I also had to realize that while I was looking for an answer from man, God was right by me waiting for me to ask for His help.

You see, I was reared in the church; I saw first hand the things that God is capable of doing. I have been the editor of this wonderful page for two years and counting and have been writing about what God can do. But when my “storm” came, besides all of the things I know, I allowed myself to be overtaken by the enemy.

While waiting for the results from my second round of blood work, everyday I thanked God for my miracle, I thanked Him that He chose to use me to show just how much He is capable of, I thanked Him that I would live and not die, I thanked Him for the testimony that He would have me to tell, I thanked Him for my joy, peace, rest and for the task that He was preparing me for.

On August 25th, after about two weeks of not hearing anything from the specialist, I called him up to see what was going on. He said, “Ms. Minor, I have reviewed all of the results from your first and second blood work-up and I don’t know how to explain it but everything came back negative this time.”

I couldn’t contain my spirit; I began to thank God for doing what he said he would do. The doctor asked me why was I crying and all I could say was that I was happy and that GOD IS SO GOOD.

I said all that to say that if God said He is going to do something you better believe it will come to pass. Where the doctors finish that is when God steps in and does his part. When I learned how to change my thought process, think positive and believe without a shadow of a doubt that I was healed, then that’s when I was healed.

I had to realize that what I went thought was not about me, God was just using me to edify Himself and His word. We must remember that when we face adversity and hardships in life, we can rise up with boldness and confidence, knowing that because of God we are able to overcome them.

Secondly, we must learn to guard our mind, control our thought life and begin to dwell on the good things of God. If we always think little, believe little, and expect little, then we will receive little.

I know you all are probably wondering why I chose to tell my personal business to the whole world. Sometimes in life we have to allow ourselves to be “put on the chopping block,” so that that person out there that’s going through something that he/she can’t seem to “see the light at the end of the tunnel,” know that if God brought you to it, He will always bring you through it

You may have some scars, may have some bad days, your friends and family may turn their backs on you but just remember that God is standing beside you waiting for you to call His name.

I thank God that I had the opportunity to tell you all my story. Keep in mind, if you change your thinking, God can and will change your life.